How To Find Motivation After The Loss Of A Loved One

Submitted By: Maria C. Lopez | Age: 29 

Perhaps, one of the hardest things to do in life is finding motivation to move on after you lost someone you love. Losing someone who matters can bring heartache and pain, sleepless night, and not finding the courage to face life.
When you’re hurt, you have the tendency to shut yourself down from the outside world. You lose interest in everything. You are no longer excited about waking up in the morning, and you’re feeling tired easily.

When you lost someone, whether by death, divorce or separation, the pain is unbearable. You feel like your chest continues to hurt and your tears just would not stop. No matter what your family and friends do to comfort you, it’s just so impossible to see hope.

Denial is the first thing that happens after losing a loved one. Maybe that person is someone who is part of your everyday life, or that person is someone that you share your dreams with. Now that person is not here, how will you go on?

Coping With the Death Of A Loved One

When someone you love unexpectedly died, it seems grieving is unending. It is difficult to accept that the person is no longer with you now. You have to accept that the person would no longer come back, no matter what you do.

After the denial process is over, the grieving process would soon be followed by acceptance. Here, you would start reviving the memories of your loved one as your coping mechanism. You would look at the photo albums, talk about your loved one with your friends and family, listen to the voice of your loved one on your phone, or watch videos.

Coping with Separation or Divorce

Coping with the loss of someone you loved could also happen with someone who is still existing, but you could no longer be together no matter what. In this case, you possibly had a divorce or you are now separated from your partner.
When a person chose to walk away from your life, coping up is more challenging. Aside from adjusting to the loss of that person, you have to deal with the negative emotion of stress, rejection, and isolation.

Perhaps, you would intend to patch up things and fight for your love. You would follow your loved one and ask for another chance. Probably, you would beg or insist that person to come back, or you would ask the help of your friends to intervene.

Indeed, dealing with the loss of your loved one is a hard thing to do. Whether it is through death or separation, healing takes a significant amount of time. It takes months, sometimes it can even take some years or even forever to finally accept it.

A person takes time to grieve. It couldn’t be forced or rushed. When the person is ready, healing would follow. After grieving, the person could start looking forward to finding hope and motivation to begin life.

Getting motivation would not be easy, but you have to help yourself and move on. If the source of your sorrow is a broken relationship, healing would be faster after you realized the benefits of not having that person anymore. Perhaps that person is a manipulative person who always treats you bad. Now, look how comfortable and peaceful your life would be without that person?

When it comes to moving on from the death of a loved one, it would be harder for the people who were left behind. However, in due time, realizing that the person is in a good place now, free from physical pain and sorrows, would help you accept it. Moving on takes time, patience and prayers.

Maria Lopez is an English blogger and writer on the subjects of motivation and healing as well as marijuana addiction help. She has inspired a lot of people through her work who thought life was cruel. Maria loves spending time with her pets, touring with her family and collecting books.


  • I just lost my friend almost a month ago. I have his cd, but I have lost interest in things I used to like doing. He was my friend for 23.5 years. I used to call other friends and write letters. Can’t get re motivated. Please help.

  • I agree. Have heard it all. I have no energy or motivation and what I just read was of no help…

  • I agree with the two above comments. I wanted to find motivation, instead I found the same thing that I find in grieving articles and things people say. I’m sorry but this isn’t useful.

  • I agree with Amanda! This post is useless. It doesn’t say any true facts or helpful tips to find motivation. The author just continues to repeat bs lines throughout the article. Please delete this it isn’t helpful at all.

  • Sooo….. How is that helping find motivation. Your just repeating everything that everyone else has said…. The “grieving process”, the “they’re in a better place”… None of this helps find motivation. You’re stating very vague facts about death or divorce…. This blog helps no one.

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