However I have recently been made aware that using “gal” to address my black friends is not appropriate, particularly here in the south. Also, the above comments help me to understand even more of the depth of how the word was used in the past.

So ladies, please forgive all us “guys” for using a word that might offend!

I am not afraid of diversity, and don’t care for political correctness. Rather I cherish those around me. I dive right in and ask. One of the things I appreciate the most about my black (& other “non-white”) friends is we can talk about the worst and the deepest subjects because we love each other! Now I have a bigger family!

I don’t believe intent magically makes a word inoffensive, but words work on the shared meanings that we create and they don’t mean anything without a conversational context.

Here in the UK, ‘Gal’ and ‘Guy’ are vaguely American sounding words for woman and man. In at least some areas of the southern states of the USA, it’s clear that they communicate very different ideas. This is by no means the only linguistic gap between the two regions.

Would it be very surprising to learn that words that are used in one conversation in one area of the USA may carry an significantly different meaning (or at least different connotations) in a different conversation in a different area of the USA?

The lesson I took from reading this thread was not ‘never use the term gal’, but instead to be careful about how and when I use the term gal. For example, should I ever find myself talking to a black woman from the USA, I shalln’t be tempted to use it to describe it…

Stop trying to make an innocent word bad because some people used it in a mean manner in the past. The majority of people used it in an innocent, benign way, including the country’s first “black” president.

It all can be summed up by an analogy someone used earlier on this thread: How would you feel if you had to stop using an innocent word you have been using all your life, because it was discovered that some idiot used it in a mean way 100 years ago?

By the way, “guy” is officially offensive in America now. I found out that racist “black” women once used this term in a derogatory manner toward young “white” and “Hispanic” men. Please never say it again, or I will report you, and you could be fired because “I don’t know if I can take it anymore” (Quoting Nell from a previous post)

I moved to South Texas 2 1/2 years ago and so am still not familiar with ALL the various cultural nuances here in the South. I certainly was not aware of every way African Americans have been slurred throughout history.

Yesterday I refered to a female who happed to be A.A. , and whom I had never met before in my entire life, as a gal. She took such great offense, she went immediately to my supervisor and reported that I was “going around calling her gal”. I took offense that without knowing ANYTHING about me, she would assume that I am the type of person who would knowingly use a derogatory term. I felt she handled the situation very poorly. All she had to do was pull me aside let me know she found the term offensive. All I needed was a little gentle education. I did apologize and explained that I didn’t mean any offense, but I was truly flabergasted.

If you find a word offensive, I won’t use it, but don’t assume that I know it’s offensive – especially when you know nothing about me or my background.

By the way, the word gal originated somewhere between 1785 and 1795 and was a dialect pronunciation of “girl.”

That said, I was part of an offsite deployment with a young black female colleague with whom I have a good relationship. When I used the word “gal” in casual conversation riding in the car, she said that she thought the word was insulting. I had NEVER heard that “gal” might have offensive racial connotations, and, like an idiot, assumed we were talking about a generational difference rather than a racial one. I SO missed the point that I later sent an email informing other co-workers of a project she was going to be handling that I very nearly referred to her as the “Go-To Gal” in exactly the same way I would have referred to a male as the “Go-To Guy” on a project.

It was only now, more than a year later, after seeing someone say “I’m just crazy ’bout that gal!” (referring to Melissa Harris-Perry) and that person being informed that it was a racist term, that I have realized how much in error I was.

My point is: it is NOT widely known that African-American women find this term offensive. I don’t seek to offend ANYONE unless I WANT them to be offended, and here I was – as southern a white male as there is – literally ignorant of the entire issue. I’ve used this word my whole life as the feminine equivalent to “guy”.

While I wish I had explored the subject in more depth with my co-worker, I’m sure as hell glad she didn’t fly off on the hair-trigger that some people seem to have. Geez, folks, moderate your responses appropriate to the situation… thank God she knew me and knew I wasn’t trying to belittle her.