“Trophy Wife” Is Not A Compliment

While skipping through channels in our Chicago hotel room last weekend, we came across a NutriSystem commercial. NutriSystem is some kind of weight-loss gimmick for people who don’t think a healthy diet and regular exercise will work for them. Anyway, the commercial ends with a success-story-testimonial of a woman who says “now my husband calls me his trophy wife.” :o

I think it is time we women sit up and take notice of marketing and speak up when it is offensive. “Trophy Wife” is not a compliment…just take a look at the following definitions:

American Heritage Dictionary

An attractive, young wife married to a usually older, affluent man.

Wikipedia

Trophy wife is a highly pejorative term, usually applied to a physically attractive younger woman married to a man who has observed a high level of success, be it physical, financial, or otherwise. Usually, the Trophy Wife is not the first wife of the man who has a high level of success and has little to do with the achievement of that success. The term is often used to imply that the man’s intent is to exhibit his wealth and success, the social phenomenon known as conspicuous consumption. The term “gold digger” is used to describe a woman who intentionally seeks this arrangement.

The marriage of former Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith to oil magnate J. Howard Marshall is an extreme example as at the time of their marriage, he was 89 years old and she was 26.

Dictionary.com

a wife who is an attractive young woman; seldom the first wife of an affluent older man; “his trophy wife was an asset to his business”

Ugh. What a horrible way to be identified. I do not want my husband to be proud of me for how I look, I want him to be proud of me for who I am and the positive things I contribute to this world. Hello? What woman wouldn’t want that from a man?

I just did a little Google research on NutriSystem and sure enough, their marketing CEO is a man by the name Tom Connerty. Hey NutriSystem – it’s time to hire a woman to head up your marketing department! Perhaps then your marketing focus would be on the healthy benefits of losing weight and staying healthy rather than how the woman looks to the men in her life. /:)

36 comments

  • justadude

    Uh yeah, right, you’d MUCH prefer it if your husband didn’t find you attractive, and liked you for your “personality” LOL

  • come on, cry me a river :'(

  • Kimberly

    Seriously Ladies,

    Dontcha think that anyone (male or female) looking for a quick fix to improve their appearance (versus modifying their diet and exercising), may just be shallow enough to respond to marketing like this?

    These ploys can offend some yet appeal to the sheeple. C’mon, give credit where credit is due.

  • My last girlfriend broke up with me because, in her own words: “I was a trophy girlfriend and you didn’t treat me like one.”

    I can’t make that stuff up.

    And besides, she was only a year younger than me, and subjectively, I think I look the younger of the two. Objectively, that’s exactly what the bouncer of a pub thought one night when we both managed to show up without IDs (he said she looked 25, but he thought I was under age). We’re both in our early 40s.

    Which is my way of saying some narcissists out there have embraced the term. Blech.

  • A

    Why? Because the world would be a very boring place if we did not all think differently. I love hearing the viewpoints of others and engaging in healthy debates. I always learn new things. :)

  • Wow….I can only say, I am so surprised to read the remarks on this forum. I accidentally came across this researching Nutrisystem. Anyway, God gives everyone an opinion and because we have freedom of speech, we tend to voice our opinion of others. Why?

  • You all need to lighten up. I’m sure you have bigger things to worry about then coming on a forum and bitching.

  • I’ve never seen the nutrisystem ad, but it makes me glad I don’t watch TV. There so much of that ridiculous mentality out there. People are judging books by covers way too much these days. If someone ever called me a “trophy”, I think I’d have to find a REAL trophy and bean them over the head with it!

  • I stumbled upon this site when I was doing a Google search for “Nutrisystem bikini girls.” Good night, those girls are hot! I was hoping Nutrisystem would put out more of a dedicated website with tons of galleries of these girls or maybe a behind the scenes video of their bikini shoots, and maybe a calendar, too! But, I regress. I must say I didn’t expect there to be this much resistance to the premise of these commercials in this day and age where tolerance should reign. I see a leap in logic from most of the posters on this topic. Some posters assume since they use good looking girls in swimsuits that men will automatically objectify them. I’m a guy and I like seeing attractive girls in bikinis just as much as the next guy but that doesn’t mean I’m going to objectify these girls just because they have “smoking hot bodies” and they are showing them off in these commercials. I don’t think you give men enough credit. We can appreciate a hot bikini girl and NOT objectify her. I’m sure I’ll hear different from the women on this site but you don’t speak for men and it’s not like you’ve been in a man’s head. Second of all, the commercial is marketed towards women in the first place. They are trying to get the women to buy this not men. Lastly, look at the men’s commercial. It has John Kruk saying “My wife told me I’m not as disgusting to her as I used to be.” I find that humorous but I can just imagine the reaction it would get if it was a woman saying instead of a man. Oh my, this board would be in an uproar over the hateful misogynist comment! What a double standard that is.

    Finally, to answer your question Gretchen, it would not be acceptable to call that girl a “whore.” I’ve never heard that term used as a compliment and I would be appalled to hear that in a commercial as I champion the equality of women and advocate for them whenever I can. But the use of trophy wife was meant as a compliment. In this case the husband is so pleased with his wife’s appearance that he uses this term to describe just how good she looks. She uses “jokingly” because he must already treat her as an equal and value her character, talents, and personality. Having her improve her looks is an added bonus.

  • A

    I also wanted to address the “hateful feminist drivel” part. I don’t see where it is hateful to form an opinion. I am not opposed to women looking good. I encourage it, but not to the extreme that we have to look a certain way, be a certain size or wear (or not wear) certain items of clothing. To me, attractive is equal to “healthy” and that is what I strive for. Yes, I work out, dress up and make myself look good – every day – whether I am leaving my house or not. When my husband goes to work and puts my picture on his desk, I want him to say “that’s my wife” and then proceed to tell people about who I am and what I am doing with my talents, not go on and on about what I look like. I want to be valued for me as a person, not me as a supermodel.

cowgirl

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