I am thankful for the many visitors who stop by and leave an encouraging comment. They brighten my day and I revisit them often and smile.

I am thankful for the many fans who have purchased Girls Can’t WHAT? gear in its many forms for themselves or as gifts for loved ones. Your generosity has enabled us to help so many other women achieve their hopes and dreams.

I am thankful for the many eye-opening discussions we have had through the blog. So many creative minds and alternate viewpoints… I always learn something new.

I am thankful for KIVA and their business model which has helped us provide micro-loans to women who are enhancing their businesses and becoming empowered through our gifts.

I am thankful for all of the women who have shared their stories with us on this site. They are inspirational in every way and they continue to encourage those following in your footsteps.

I am thankful for everyone who has submitted a design request. You have provided me with an endless list of fantastic ideas and someday I will get to them all!

I am thankful for all the Facebook and Twitter followers who have graciously retweeted and shared Girls Can’t WHAT? with thousands (maybe even millions) of people. You help spread empowerment, one link at a time!

Without you, I would have given up on trying to change the world long ago. Every single one of you has an impact on Girls Can’t WHAT? and for that I am truly thankful.

This site is very popular and I get a lot of emails from young girls asking for advice.  A pretty decent amount of these are more or less complaints about not getting to play in a sport or being discriminated against based on their gender.  Most women have encountered this in their lives at some point, correct?

So what are our options? In my mind, we have 3 choices: complain, educate or just do nothing. I’m certain we can all agree that doing nothing isn’t a solution. So that leaves us with…

Complaining

Where does that get us? Actually, complaining can work in many cases. Remember the 14 year old girl that was upset there were no female hockey characters depicted in her video game?  Well she complained and look where it got her. Complaining does work. It requires finesse and just plain being nice about your complaint, but it does work sometimes.

But what about when it doesn’t?

Education

I have said many times before that education is the key to changing gender bias. So how do we educate? Too many times when we think “educate” we associate that with school. I’m not talking about creating social programs or adding to the curriculum. I’m talking about lifelong one-to-one teaching each other to see gender as something that makes us different but does not divide us. And it certainly doen’t mean that female = weak.

So here are my thoughts. When people are learning something new, they often look for examples. Most folks are visual and like videos or images. When they can picture what we are trying to teach them, they education is more likely to stick.

So what can we do?

I’d like to see Girls Can’t WHAT? be an educational tool for women everywhere. Let them come and search for topics and learn from the experiences of others as well as see proof that women are playing professional football, becoming firefighters, riding motorcycles and skydiving.

The Share Your Story section has become wildly popular on here.  I get tons of submissions every week and I generally have to sift through to pick out the best ones because there are so many. I love these stories and I’d like to see them continue, but with a little added twist. How about some more videos or photos of women doing extraordinary things…things women aren’t likely to be seen doing. Let’s create an archive of “teaching materials” that can be shared with family, friends, teachers, camp counselors, etc.

This is where you come in…

Do you know of a great video, interview, web site or any other truly inspiring resource that can feature on the Girls Can’t WHAT? site? Please send it my way or add it to the share your story section so I can post it. I know there’s way more information out there than I will ever have time to research. Can you help me?

Another way you can help is by sharing the Girls Can’t WHAT? site with other women you know that would benefit from a little encouragement or who might have a great story or video to share with us. The search function on Girls Can’t WHAT? is really super. Here are a few sample searches you can use to find information to share: Football, Wrestler, Firefighter, Drummer, Military

Want to be interviewed? Email me. I’m open to any and all ideas. Let’s hear from you…what else would you like to see on here?  Leave your ideas in the comments below.

For three days, I laid in intensive care while doctors discussed the options with my parents, who despite broken ribs and other various injuries, had continued to travel with me from one medical facility to the next. The doctors taking on my case had seen similar injuries before. They worked closely with the race car drivers at the Indy 500 track and handled a lot of “high impact” injuries before. However, in most of the cases, the injured persons were left paralyzed from the waist down. Things weren’t looking so good for me.

Although most of the events from that time (20+ years ago) are fuzzy, there is one thing I remember fairly clearly. No one ever told me that the odds were impossible. I was simply told they were improbable. I remember thinking that impossible and improbable are two different things. I figured I at least had a chance, even if it was a slim one.

On the fourth day, I was taken in for surgery and the doctors fused together what they could from the bone fragments scattered around my spinal chord. They grafted some bone from my hip and then screwed in two metal plates from the vertebra above and below the fractured one, leaving me with a scar on my right hip and an 11″ incision down my back. That was the best they could do.  Whether I could walk or not was still unknown.

A few days later, I was scheduled to start physical therapy. Doctors were baffled by my responsiveness to their tests. I had no feeling in my legs from the thigh to the knee, but everything below my knee was normal. It was the weirdest feeling, but I figured it would eventually go away. I was able to wiggle my toes and move my legs so there was hope I could eventually walk again, but it could take months.

The first task at physical therapy was to just sit up. That was the easy part. Next was standing and then eventually I had to try to take a few steps. My first session was probably only an hour long, maybe even less. I had been bed-ridden for well over a week by this point and I was in pretty weak condition, but I took that first step. I adjusted my grip on the handrail and took another. And another. After what seemed like an eternity to me, I reached the end of the rail and slowly turned around to make my way back. It seemed to take forever, but I made it.

Each step became easier and easier until within a week I was walking slowly, but somewhat normally. My full recovery took several months and to this day I still don’t have all the feeling back in my legs. I have back pain from time to time and my right foot turns to the outside. I can’t cross my legs for more than a minute without hip pain, but I can walk, run, jump, swim, play drums and do just about everything the doctors told me I “probably” wouldn’t be able to do – or at least do “normally”.

My journey was not impossible, it was simply improbable. There is a fine line between the two, but I’ve come to think that most things are simply improbable. Next time you see something that seems impossible, take a closer look and determine if it’s really impossible or improbable.

Improbable just means you have to work a little bit harder to get there.

Shortly after the release of my band’s new album, I was interviewed by See Jane Drum – a web site for female drummers.

They let me plug the Girls Can’t WHAT? site and there’s a little backstory there about how I got started playing drums as well as how Girls Can’t WHAT? was born. Check it out!

And if you’re a drummer, subscribe and be a Facebook fan! SeeJaneDrum.com is a great resource for chicks with sticks.

If you’re new to Girls Can’t WHAT? – check out my recent announcement about reaching one of my biggest dreams.

My prediction became eerily true as it was in fact 2008 when my band traveled to Nashville which led to a recording deal which leads me to this post…

Yesterday, my band, Four Wall Flight, released our very first full-length CD.

It may not mean all that much to anyone else, but it was mind-blowing for me to look at iTunes yesterday and see my band’s new album listed there for all the world to hear.

Years of practice, training, learning, hard work, blood, sweat and tears have all gone into this project. When we say this album was a labor of love, there should be a heavy emphasis on the word LABOR because let me tell you it was intense.

And if you’ve been a long time reader of Girls Can’t WHAT?, you’ve probably heard me say time and time again not to limit yourself to a single skill set.  I frequently emphasize embracing multiple talents because it broadens your opportunities. Here’s a good model of that philosophy…

In my band, we are not only musicians, but each of us has individual skills that contributed to this album beyond musicianship. The videos were all created and added to YouTube by Kelli. Trina handled all of the graphic design for the album and for the web site.  And me? I coded the entire website and put together the ordering process for the CDs. Talk about a Girls Can’t WHAT? moment! This project is our handiwork in more ways than one!

For those of you who’ve already purchased a copy during yesterday’s launch, thank you! We are still “green” (fans will get that pun) when it comes to the music industry and relatively unknown outside our our local area. If you haven’t heard our music yet, we invite you to listen to the samples on the music page or watch one of the videos to hear a full song.

We’d love it if you would help us spread the word by posting a link to our site on Facebook or tweeting about us with the tag #FourWallFlight. You can also use one of the social icon links below to share this post. We appreciate your support of Four Wall Flight and thank you to everyone who has encouraged me to reach this moment.

Extra kudos to my graphic designer, Trina, for making them beautiful (I’m just the geek behind the screen compiling code).

AfroPuffs and PonyTails

This site is a great resource for African American girls. There are lots of fantastic topics and discussions on a variety of topics. You’ll find tons of information from books, clubs, camps and mentoring programs.

In particular, I like how AfroPuffs and Ponytails celebrates the achievements of young ladies in all areas of life. The site is a very positive source of encouragement for everyone.

Owner Kim Thomas is well-informed and very active in keeping the site up to date.

Visit Afro Puffs and Ponytails

Inspire USA Foundation

The Inspire USA Foundation works primarily with teens and young adults to help them live happier lives.  They take on tough issues like suicide and mental health and work with teams to reach out to people in need.

One of their biggest projects, the ReachOut.com site is a popular place for teens.  Last month they reached over 60,000 young people.

Visit Inspire USA Foundation

Girlz Voices

GirlzVoices is also geared to the younger crowd (see a theme here?)  They feature an advice column and radio podcast where you can ask questions and get solid, trustworthy answers.

The site is still pretty new, but it’s packed full of features and great content.  Check it out and join their community or ask a question and get some answers!

Visit GirlzVoices.com

See why I love my day job?  I get to help people who help other people make a difference in the world.  :)

So I gotta move.  That means I gotta pack up all my files and switch to a bigger server.  This is a good thing, but as with any move it’s also a time-consuming thing.  Not something I planned for (at least not yet) but growing pains are part of the process.

And this is right before the holiday sales rush, too, so I need to move quickly.  October through December are my highest sales months and the traffic to this site is only going to increase so I need to high-tail it out of here or risk crashing the server again and being permanently expelled.

So bear with me while I relocate.  It should go smoothly (in theory), but in case it doesn’t – just know that I will be back shortly and we can return to our regularly scheduled programming.

Success is often measured by sales, profit margins and income. Depending on who you ask, I’m either making a lot of money or I’m barely getting by. I do track my finances and of course my goal is to increase revenues to make more money. But what most people don’t see is where those profits go and why I want to make more money. I don’t pocket all of that cash.

I don’t want to.

Margaret Mead once said “I personally measure success in terms of the contributions an individual makes to her or his fellow human beings.”

If I were to use my talents to amass a fortune in money and material goods, what do I really gain?  Nothing useful. My goal is to keep just enough earnings to live comfortably and give the rest away to help other people in need.  By “need” I mean other people who are willing to help themselves but just need a little extra boost to get there.

I have a real hangup about giving handouts. The people who will most appreciate your investment are the ones who take what you give them and turn it into something more. This is why I like KIVA. The women there have real needs and strive to better themselves by working hard and using their talents to get there.  It’s not a handout.  It’s an investment.  And it’s one that can be reinvested over and over to help even more people.

So when people ask me about my business, I have two answers.

When they ask what I do for a living, I tell them about my super power: “I challenge women to break through gender stereotypes and achieve their dreams.”

When they ask if it is successful, I can confidently reply by telling them about the women’s lives we have invested in and how those women are now helping others in their community to prosper as well.  Those are the real success stories and I am thankful that Girls Can’t WHAT? can be a part of that every day.

Thank you to everyone who supports this site and knows what it really means to say “Girls Can’t WHAT?”!

It’s 2010.  I’ve been plugging away at Girls Can’t WHAT? in my “spare” time since 2005.  It has grown so much that I’m starting to think “wow, I’ve had a LOT of spare time in the last 5 years”.  But really, that’s not the case.  The success of this site is due mainly to customers and the many visitors that pop in and out to read the blog, post comments and as of last week, joining the community and getting involved in a group.

Since I’m already going against the typical political figure by not planning this post, I’m going to do something else you don’t see many politicians doing: be transparent. That means I’m just going to tell it like it is.  No fluff, no spinning it to make it look good, just pure unadulterated honesty.  So here it is.  And yes, these numbers are real.  I am pausing to look them up as I type.  :)

The Site

Girls Can’t WHAT? has been going strong and we’ve doubled our numbers in the last quarter alone.  This site averages over 25,000 hits per month and we have 5,386 comments on 1,104 posts.  That’s pretty awesome if I may say so.  It means I write a lot and you like what I write.  Thank you!  :D

Top 5 posts:

1. The Star-Spangled Banner Like You’ve Never Heard It
2. Tricks Guys Can’t Do
3. Girls Can’t Play Football
4. Annie Oakley Quotes
5. The Youngest Person To Top Mount Everest is a Girl

The Community

At nearly 2,000 members, we’re doing fantastic as a growing group of women.  We may have a wide range in ages here, but we all have the same common purpose.  To empower women!  With the new networking in place, we can do that on even bigger level now and our community can continue to grow.  If you aren’t already in a group, find one that fits your interests, or create a new one and invite some friends.  It’s an easy way to connect with other ladies who share your dreams.  Don’t be shy about posting, someone has to be first to get the ball rolling.  ;)

On Facebook, we are also approaching the 2,000 mark for the number of Girls Can’t WHAT? fans.  We’ve had some pretty lively discussions on the Facebook wall and the Girls Can’t WHAT? Flair has been added to over 100,000 profiles.  The most popular flair has been the soccer player, the golfer and the military girl. Fan photos have also recently been appearing in the fan photo album.

The Shop

Huge changes have been made to the shop in the last 3 months.  We have a new vendor which brings a larger selection of clothing and gift items.  The shop currently has around 4,600 products and within those products there are style and color variations, leaving endless possibilities for customized gift ideas.

Speaking of customization, my new vendor also allows you to add or change the design to fit your personal style.  Resize the image, add your personal text or team name to make it your own.  The step by step on screen instructions help you create your design and preview it before you order.  It’s very cool!  Look for the “customize it” button on any product to begin.

As of this writing there are nearly 300 Girls Can’t WHAT? characters available  and as soon as I finish this post I am going right back to the drawing board and work my way down the design request list.  Need a character I don’t have?  Drop me a line and let me know!

Well, that’s it.  That’s my “state of the union” speech for 2010.  Oh and I’m gonna do one more non-politican-like thing.  You know how the reporters always get to ask questions after the speech?  Well I’m gonna do that, but there’s the anti-politician part.  I’m going to answer them! No dodging, no spinning no weaseling out. You ask me and I’ll tell you.  Bring it on…

Last week, I had the privilege to go to music row in Nashville and record my band’s first album.  It’s still like a dream to even get to say that, but it really happened!  I have pictures to prove it!  There’s still a lot to do before the album is actually released, but I feel like I made it to the top of the mountain and it’s all downhill from here.

So what happens next?

I seriously have no clue.  Sure, I have other goals and lots of other things I want to achieve in life, but I’m feeling a little bit like doing nothing for a while.  Not because I’m lazy.  At first I kind of thought that, but then I realized that I needed a little time to process what just happened (the last two weeks were crazy and intense, but I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything).

Suddenly I really dig “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus because I totally get what those lyrics mean.  Yes, there is a nice breathe of fresh air here at the top of the mountain, and going downhill sounds like an easy ride but it’s actually kind of boring and unmotivating.  Even though “the climb” was really, really, REALLY hard work and it took years to get to where I stand right now, the process was actually a lot of fun.  The reward is nice and all, but I think I much more enjoyed the challenge of it all.

So I’ve taken this week to just be “lazy” which really means I’ve spent the majority of it in thought and research, calculating my next “climb”.  What will my new adventure be?  I don’t know yet, but I have some ideas.  You can be certain that I will be sharing with you what I learned over the past two weeks. I just need a few more days to process and get back into the groove of things.

At least getting down the mountain is quicker and easier than climbing up so it won’t be long.